Between Beltane and the approaching full moon, a familiar yet rarely lived quality grows stronger. An inner remembering of what we naturally sensed as children. This piece is about how that connection returns, and what happens when we no longer try to understand it but simply let it be present in us.
May 1st. Beltane.
This morning I didn't just wake up…
I arrived into something.
It's hard to put into words, but the air feels denser. As if it weren't only the visible world around me, but that other layer too, which in everyday life we tend not to notice.
The fire. Nature. The world of spirits.
And as the full moon approaches, all of this pulls me in even more strongly. Not subtly… but very concretely. As if something said: pay attention.
Be present. Don't walk past it.
For me, this has always been familiar.
As a child I would stand out among the trees, and I simply knew things. I didn't think about it. I didn't question it. I sensed the weather, I sensed the space, and yes… I sensed what others didn't say, or didn't want to notice. Back then this was natural. I didn't call it anything. I didn't put it into a system. I just lived in it.
And now, years later, the same quality returns.
In the sound of drums.
In silence.
In moments when I don't try to understand it… I just let it happen.
And meanwhile I see how far we have drifted from this. Not because it was lost, but because we don't use it. We don't connect. We don't stop long enough to even notice.
That is why I so look forward to Anna Saqqara arriving from Glastonbury, from that environment where this isn't theory… it's life.
Because when a quality like this enters a space, "something" doesn't just happen there.
Something awakens. Not outside. Within us.
And maybe that is what is working in me most strongly right now.
That I no longer want to simply "understand" all of this.
I want to be in it.
In the fire.
In the drum.
In that raw, ancient connection that requires no explanation.
And perhaps right now, between Beltane and the full moon, it is a little easier to step back into this.
Not to think about it.
But to let it happen.
And you… as you read this, do you just understand… or do you also feel?
(I, by the way, still sometimes catch myself trying to "understand" it quickly… and then I realise that this is exactly what works least well at such times.)
With a hug,
Vilma
© Vilma's Morning Thoughts
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